Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
this must be what syphilis tastes like
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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