his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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