found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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