i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
There was a lot of him and a little penis
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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