I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize