are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
