I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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