i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
