i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
