Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
