He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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