There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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