ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Come on in and take your pants off
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