honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
