I'm eating all of the evidence.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize
