do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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