My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
