At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
did i just pee glitter
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
