did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
