I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
