Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
