See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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