that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
