Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
