You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
