Say something about gay babies.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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