dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize