Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
