my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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