I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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