Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
