..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
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