so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
