just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
