she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize