So drunk its hurt
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
