the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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