Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize