The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
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i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
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I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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