So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Randomize