i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
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So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
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If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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