She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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