Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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