I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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