butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
