guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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