just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize
