Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
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my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
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So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
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