The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
