no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
where does the pee come out of this thing
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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