she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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